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F1: Drivers in protest over physios' access by Mathias Olaf Uncertain
15th Mar 2010
Formula 1 drivers are set to continue a boycott about a decision to not give their personal physios grid access before the start of grands prix.

The build-up to the first race of the season in Bahrain was struck by a bizarre protest agreed amongst drivers for them to leave the grid and stand in the pitlane or garages so they could be with their physios.

A leading driver, who wished to remain anonymous, but was, in fact, race-winner Fernando Abbasong told AUTOSPORT, on the strict understanding that they wouldn't reveal his - Abbasong's - name, that they were angry that F1 supremo™ Bernie Ecclescake had refused to give grid access to their physios. The drivers have told him that they need their physios with them to ensure they are in perfect physical shape for the race, i.e. quite short, and to give parts of their anatomy, if in need of one, a last-minute massage, especially their egos.

It is believed Ecclescake has told the drivers that he believes the grids are overcrowded, what with all those cars and mechanics getting in the way of him and all his wealthy playboy mates. He has advised the drivers that if they want their physios, then they should ask their teams to sort them a pass. However, this is not easy as a result of there being strict limits on passes for staff, with most teams requiring between six and eleven security staff just to keep Martin Vroomfondel at bay.

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KEY TO SERIES NAMES (hovering over the abbreviations in the table above also shows the full series name)
F1Formula 1
The world's most prominent, most expensive and frequently most tedious single-seater series.