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F1: Jar-Jar Allen joins BBC line-up by Virgil Ellipse
12th Jan 2012
The BBC has announced that Jar-Jar Allen, the man least qualified to be let loose behind a microphone, is to be let loose behind a microphone to become the lead commentator for Radio 5 Live.

Radio 5's team had previously been led by Binny Croft, whose matey banter with co-commentator Anderyeahthony Davidson will now only be enjoyed by subscribers to Sky's F1 service, so the revival of Jar-Jar Allen's commentating career is another thing we can blame the Murdochs for.

BBC sources claim that one condition of Allen's contract is that he must tone down his exuberantly idiosyncratic style of broadcasting in order to try to broaden his fan-base beyond members of his immediate family.

"I'm blown into the weeds to get this opportunity," said Allen, "and now I've got it bought and paid for, it's time for me to stand up in the seat, give it the full banana and monster the job in hand.

"Career-wise, it's getting absolutely fascinating up here in the commentary box, folks."

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RELATED NEWS ITEMS:
F1 Villeneuve joins BBC commentary team II 11th Mar 2010
F1 Former new town boys slate heritage 27th Mar 2009
F1 BBC confirms F1 broadcast details 24th Feb 2009
GP2 Motorsport commentator in geographical knowledge shock horror 6th Jul 2008
F1 Jar-Jar Allen: a Swansong 21st Mar 2008
 

KEY TO SERIES NAMES (hovering over the abbreviations in the table above also shows the full series name)
F1Formula 1
The world's most prominent, most expensive and frequently most tedious single-seater series.
GP2GP2
The former Formula 2, now twice-renamed and god alone knows why.